Are YOU a Stander or a Mover?
“The greatest thing in the world isn’t so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving…” — Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
In our walk through life we can often look into the eyes of others and see different things. For example, when looking into the eyes of any student are you able to see that for which they are studying; be it a doctor, teacher, journalist, author, actor, singer, or…? Surely, you have seen those who have lost their job, but when you looked into their eyes did you see a successful entrepreneur? When looking into the eyes of a single woman do you see a future mother? When a relative or a friend has had health issues did you see them as a future model of health? In other words were any of these people conveying what they truly wanted or were they standing still? Were they going after life with a passion or simply standing in one place waiting for life to come to them?
When you can see the passion in their eyes then be assured they are going to get what they are after. They are not waiting for life to come to them. On the contrary, they are taking life by storm. They have decided what is going to happen in their life and they are not going to stop until they get it. Unfortunately, this is not the case with a vast majority of people. Too many wait for life to come to them. They in essence stand in one place moving in no definitive direction. The obvious result is they GET NO DEFINITIVE RESULTS.
Why does this happen? In many cases it is because we are overly concerned with what is happening to or for the benefit of those around us. We become too caught up in what they are or are not doing as well as what they are or are not getting. Taking on this attitude will open our eyes to such things as:
1. The bosses kids always get favored
2. The manager has a favorite that always gets the best hours or the best choices
3. Blessings that seem to come to everyone else even though they are not working as hard
4. The mindset becomes that of a pessimist with the belief that nothing works for me so why try so hard?
The truth is, in most cases, it isn’t that you are not trying hard enough it is you are not trying at all! The proof of this is the fact you know so much about others and what they are doing and getting rather than being focused on what you are doing and or what you are producing. Your attention is not on your own goals as much as it is on the goals and lives of those around. The fact is, your attention is divided for you are too focused on what is happening to others. Due to your focus being on others instead of your own goals, there are no definitive results ON YOUR BEHALF.
Although the type of people mentioned above have existed every company for which I have worked, there was a company many years ago where I had a coworker that defied the usual. He was a very nice guy, even endearing and cordial yet, he never seemed to make it to the next level. Different from most of those mentioned above, he tried hard, very hard. Somehow he never seemed to achieve that level of success for which he so desperately sought. It was obvious to me he was studying and learning the profession. There was something missing however, for he was never able to get passed a certain point. I found it was due to ALL that he was focused on.
I went on to purchase the company while he went on learn and know everything about everyone not only in our company, but in most of the other companies in the industry. He was totally caught up in everything everyone else was doing or not doing. He knew their personal problems as well as the problems they were having with their employer or boss. He knew of all the problems of those employed by me. He knew of the problems of those above him and below him. I was sure he was talking good and bad of our company in the same manner those talking to him were of the company for which they worked. Truth is his focus was off. He was not focused on the right things. He focused on what others were doing not what HE needed to do to move forward in life.
The bottom line was then and is to this day that the person I speak of above has never made it past a certain point. Oh, he was finally able to co-own his own company and the reason for him being a co-owner is because the other owner was the individual that qualified for the engineering degree necessary to provide the certification for their firm. None the less his company has never grown past a certain point and this simply because he has never grown past a certain point. By chance I met him at a small lunch place some months ago. It was nice at first, but I soon realized nothing had changed – all these years later nothing had changed. He was still into knowing everything about everyone. He still carried past issues and hurts, which were evident in his speech; for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. What is in your heart in abundance will come out. Get anyone to speak long enough and you will find out the force that drives and motivates them.
During our conversation, over lunch, I found him to be no different than he was all those years ago when he worked with, then for me. He was still focused on what others were doing and not what he should be doing. There is a Biblical term that says, “Where your heart is there will your treasure be also…” Apparently, his treasure is to know everything about everyone rather than building up for himself and his family that which is important TO THEM.
It is this way with many. They are still standing in the place they were yesterday, last month, last year, twenty years ago or more. They are not moving in a direction that will help them keep up with and enjoy life therefore, life is passing them by. They are focused on and know way too much about other people and their situations. Although they have goals, they are not single minded focusing all of their energies on achieving these goals. They start down the path but then are drawn off by their infatuation of knowing what is going on in the lives of those around them. As a result their energies are diluted leaving too little to accomplish these goals. Their inability to accomplish then becomes the fault of everyone else. You can hear it when they talk.
In his case he was still hung up on what happened between me, him and my younger brother. He felt he should have had a certain opportunity rather than it being given to my brother. This was a situation from twelve years ago yet, he was still standing there in that same spot twelve years later. He had not grown. He had not recognized that life is what we make of it. Life is ours to mold and form. Bad and good happens, but it is our response to what happens that makes the difference in our tomorrows. His response was and is still is to react to what happened AND HOLD ONTO IT. By doing so he is allowing a ball and chain to be strapped to his ankles holding him in the past and keeping him from moving forward toward the goals he so desperately wanted to achieve. Because he cannot let go of yesterday, he is allowing this to keep his energies divided and diluted.
You will find that people who are so caught up in what others do are also caught up in listening to gossip as well as starting their own. This is also why their energies are divided and diluted. Personally, I have never allowed this type of behavior to set up household in my brain. I do not choose to stand in the same place for very long as I like moving along with life and making life worth living. It is kind of like watching the news or reading the newspaper. To me this is no different than gossip. It already happened and you can’t do anything about it so who cares? I like making my own news. It works better for me. How about you?
Best of LUCK as you
Labor Under Correct Knowledge…